tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5552184.post114407964237075410..comments2023-06-10T09:49:08.539-04:00Comments on midlife mama: mean girlsLibbyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09406720496767981522noreply@blogger.comBlogger4125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5552184.post-1144248709183791752006-04-05T10:51:00.000-04:002006-04-05T10:51:00.000-04:00Thanks for sharing that, Libby. As a teacher of bo...Thanks for sharing that, Libby. As a teacher of boys, your story made me think about how differently boys relate, at least at the preadolescent stage. Shunning and leaving another out of the group is a tactic that is rarely used among the boys I teach. And playing jokes on each other -- even mean ones -- is forgiveable. They act out their cruelty more often through physical intimidation (the bigger, most athletic guys call the shots) and wits (a sharp, sarcastic sense of humor gets a lot of mileage).Mamacitahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04986569353958429057noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5552184.post-1144161073086498072006-04-04T10:31:00.000-04:002006-04-04T10:31:00.000-04:00Susan, thanks for that insight. It's really helpf...Susan, thanks for that insight. It's really helpful to me to think about why <B>I</B> wanted to do that: I am pretty sure the ringleader was someone who seemed much cooler to me, more "in," in some important way, and I had something (access, imagination) that she wanted to use... Or that's how I imagine it went, anyway.<BR/><BR/>Becca, it looks like she's posting her old teen diary? Weird!Libbyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09406720496767981522noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5552184.post-1144086049007403432006-04-03T13:40:00.000-04:002006-04-03T13:40:00.000-04:00Libby, this is such a powerful post. I think ALL o...Libby, this is such a powerful post. I think ALL of us are capable of everything, but I also think much of the Mean Girls literature tends to focus on the victims, and how to support them, rather than how to deal with figuring out who is doing mean stuff and why, and figuring out what THEY need.<BR/><BR/>I don't think I was that mean. I was more of the chameleon type who drifted between groups. But in 6th grade I was involved in the phenomenom of "slam books" which of course wreaked total social havoc. I was just wildly curious to know what people thought of me. Someone wrote (about me) "Don't get too close!" and I don't know if it meant in the emotional sense, or that I had B.O.<BR/><BR/>I also had a best friend who identified intensely with Harriet the Spy. We kept a Harriet style notebook where we wrote about people in our class, although not all that meanly. And the same thing happened to us: people found our notebook and passed it around, but she ended up taking most of the heat from it, not me. I felt badly about that. And then she moved to Michigan and people pretty much forgot about it.<BR/><BR/>Ahh, high school! Junior high! Memories!Susanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06853246232184157570noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5552184.post-1144085004366619582006-04-03T13:23:00.000-04:002006-04-03T13:23:00.000-04:00Oh my goodness, that is really mean! Speaking o...Oh my goodness, that is really mean! Speaking of boarding school, have you seen this: http://erstwhileslattern.blogspot.com/ (it's mainly drugs and sex, but she goes to boarding school).Beccahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12002802440403969922noreply@blogger.com